Nourish/Challenge: Week 27.

Last week, Grandmom, Josh's wonderful and sassy grandmother, died rather suddenly of cancer. She had decided against treatment, which I think most everyone understood. My mom came to our house to take care of Oliver during the memorial service. Even now, I can't believe Grandmom has left. She always made me feel that I was doing my best. At Zach and Cherylanne's wedding reception, Grandmom took my hand, and I just held on. She seemed to know that the socializing was hard for me even though I was happy to be there. She was a blessing.

Bruce and I finished The Shape of Water, our 24th book. We liked it, and we got a lot more out of the characters than would fit in the film. We're starting another book soon.

Bruce has been at the beach, so I've been checking in on his cats. I like hanging out with kitlets. One cat could take or leave me; the other adores me but won't let anyone else know.

I'm still having trouble reading and writing. It's a sickness. How can I cure it before it gets worse?

Mom challenged me to exercise for 20 minutes on most days. And I've been doing it though not quite as often as I should. I text her nightly about my exercise. Maybe I'll eventually see some results. Going back to bits of ballet and Irish step dancing bring up memories--the ballet class during my last semester of undergrad and my Irish step dancing at ages 12-15.

I got to meet Bruce's mama, sister, aunt, and cousin! I'm so glad. Check that off my wish list.

Christmas Pajamas.

One of my favorite childhood memories is of my grandparents giving or sending me pajamas to wear on Christmas Eve. All my many cousins got pajamas. Usually, they were the same styles for the girls and for the boys. We came down the staircase as a small parade for our parents' cameras.

I remember a long white nightgown with red ribbon and matching robe. I remember blue flannel pants and a solid blue tee. We usually got something extra such as a robe, slippers, or a plush toy. I kept the pajamas until they wore out. I was sad when I was too old to get them anymore.

Some years, my mom-in-law gives me pajamas (a turquoise snowflake set), and some years, my mom does (a blush set with button-down top). But last year, I bought myself Christmas pajamas, just in case. I found an ivory thermal set with images of the Disney princesses. I already got my Christmas pajamas for this year (just in case): a gray and ink top that says If the tiara fits and fleece-lined, pale pink pants with beautiful sketches of the Disney princesses. I'm wearing them now! I keep washing them so I can wear them anytime.

Still, I hope Santa will send me some Christmas pajamas. That's a size large now, Santa.

Nanna and Grandpa.

The more I think about it, the more I realize how much my grandparents influenced and inspired me while I was growing up. They are the most generous people I know, and I would be quite a different person without them.

My dad bought tickets to take Mom to The Phantom of the Opera. He told me about it, and I was so intrigued and curious. Nanna and Grandpa had the soundtrack and a beautiful souvenir program. I disappeared into one of the chairs in their living room with a borrowed Discman and the CD booklet with the full libretto. I fell desperately in love with the music. I was 7 or 8.

Grandpa gave me a Walkman and replaced it when I wore it out. It was my own magical portal to Broadway music. Eventually, Nanna and Grandpa gave me their souvenir program, and I still have it. They revealed other Andrew Lloyd Webber musicals to me-Cats, Starlight Express, Sunset Boulevard, Evita, and Joseph and the Amazing Technicolor Dream Coat. They had a wardrobe full of videos and music. It was better than a Narnia wardrobe to me. I loved peering inside.

Grandpa took me to see a local show of Funny Girl. Nanna and Grandpa took me and some cousins to the touring Beauty and the Beast.  They took me to Joseph. And they introduced many other musicals to me by VHS. Rodgers and Hammerstein--South Pacific, Sound of Music, Carousel--and others like Gigi, My Fair Lady, West Side Story, and more. Without these, my life would have far less magic. 

They also took me to Europe when I was 13. We went to France, Germany, Belgium, Switzerland, and the Netherlands. One of my favorite memories is of our walking in Paris, each holding a baguette and a Coke. Americans!

I am deeply grateful to my grandparents for opening new worlds to me.