Stillness & Attention: Week 29.

Day 1: Saturday. I finally finished The Strange Case of the Alchemist's Daughter. Bizarre and good. Long! The second book, which I've checked out, is much longer. So I've now read two books this week. I've (barely) started Plenty (a memoir that is already late) and Smoke: Poems by Dorianne Laux. As usual, I'm quite behind on library books. I'm writing with Diamine Mystique today. 

We got groceries this morning. I bought green apples and caramel sauce to try to sneak some more nutrition into Oliver's diet. He's not going for it. Josh and I like them though. We bought a few more hoarding items: sticks of butter for the freezer, syrup (the pancake mix came), 2.5 gallons of water, shell pasta and Velveeta sauce, and a lot more Gatorade Zero. Amazon doesn't have the Gatorade mix right now, and I don't know how we'd get Oliver to drink anything else.

The thunder is loud. We sat in the study for a while and watched the rain. I read a tale from Kaleidoscope and started a second before Oliver wanted to watch a video. He hasn't had an accident so far today. He also didn't wet his bed or ours. I ended up sleeping in Oliver's bed with Josh from 4:30 to 6:30 this morning--musical beds. I came downstairs and settled on my loveseat. Josh soon came down, sat with me a while, and then worked out. I read a couple of articles from Bella Grace. I want to spend some time reading beautiful magazines in the study each morning. That seems like a great way to start the day. 

I did yoga and read a dragon story for the magazine. The stories are really flowing in steadily. I wrote down my gratitude list for today and turned it into a poem. 

Day 2: Sunday. Today, Josh said, "When you're in a good mood, I can handle things. When you're not, I'm pretty much destroyed." 

I slept fitfully but managed until 6. I went down to my loveseat and did nothing. Josh came down at 7 to sit with me. Oliver came down at 8. Josh went to run, so I took care of Oliver's morning routine. I read a couple of articles from Oh Reader. I look forward to subscribing to the magazine next year. I'm writing today with Diamine Lilac Satin ink.

My Pipsticks stickers came! They're mostly travel-themed. I probably won't do much more traveling in my life, but I do have memories of some wonderful trips. We are going on a little weekend trip to Asheville next month for Josh's half-marathon! I'm really looking forward to that since we're not getting a weekend off this month. 

I made a big batch of vegetable fried rice with brown rice, riced cauliflower, carrots, broccoli, sugar snap peas, sweet peas, fire-roasted corn, baby corn, and red peppers. I ate, and I cleaned up the kitchen. 

Well, we ended up at the splash pad for four hours. We all got burned despite sunscreen. The latter two hours were pretty miserable. We only got Oliver to hydrate a little because the ice cream truck came and we got him a Popsicle. I did read a good forty pages of Joyful to Josh. He says most of it, like the aesthetics of energy and abundance, don't apply to him. Hmm. 

I've continued reading for the magazine, and the stories have continued to roll in. I seem to be the only second reader rating them right now; where is everyone? We changed our sheets, so that will be nice tonight. And my fuzzy pink (alas, more mauve than they appeared) pillows with silver stars and snowflakes arrived as did my turquoise and gold marbled tray.

Day 3: Monday. July 18. More than halfway through the month. I'm sitting in the sunshine of the study, curled up on my pink velvet loveseat with one foot on my teal velvet ottoman. I just finished reading a few articles from Oh Reader and Bella Grace. Some of the TBR books are on my list. I'd like to finish at least a couple of good magazines this month. 

This morning, I woke around 6. Josh was down here working out. I ended up sleeping for another forty-five minutes. I'm nervous about Oliver's blood work today. He didn't have any accidents over the weekend despite the four hours at the splash pad. 

I've only read one collection of short stories this month...definitely not up to my goal. I'll have to be more focused in August and September. It will get easier because more of my library books will be collections. Right now, I'm just so behind. I'll return as many books as I can on Friday. I gave up on Plenty and 13 Stories last week--I'll get back to them. 

I see big trees with puffs of white blossoms. I wonder what they are. The gray ottoman came and is now under the coats. Our new body pillow arrived, and it is so nice. I moved the old one to Oliver's crash pad. 

This is the last full week of the program Josh is coordinating. Next week, he'll mostly be wrapping up, making reports, giving presentations, and planning a celebration. He thinks he'll do this again next summer. I have mixed feelings, but it hasn't been as hard as I thought it might be. Next summer, we can pay down some more debt, build up savings, and buy a new dresser. If the summer job continues, we can eventually buy a second car...though Josh does like having only one car. 

I'm thinking about bringing some of my snowflake ornaments back out. I've loved snowflakes since I was twelve, all year. People have given me snowflake ornaments, pajamas, blankets, and other objects as gifts. I used to hang snowflakes all over my house. 

Oliver slept until 9:30--how kind! While he was in the bath, I took almost everything out of my makeup bag. I put in some favorite lipsticks and glosses. I want to create a grab-in-case-of-fire bag of my favorite makeup. I found a Hard Candy palette I'd completely forgotten. I want to have all my basics in there too, including back-up foundation, eye shadow primer, and mascara. 

Well, I got through quite a project today. I cleaned out and reorganized all my makeup. I got all my favorite and essential makeup (with extras) into my makeup bag, and I can actually see what's in the bag. I threw away old makeup and makeup that I've sampled but probably won't ever use. I organized all my palettes vertically so I can see them. I cleaned out and organized my backstock bin--everything in labeled Ziplocs. I put together a box of unused makeup that I wasn't going to use and posted it on the local BuyNothing group--someone picked it up within thirty minutes. Now, someone gets to enjoy that great makeup! Next stop: skincare. I used to have makeup subscriptions, so I have a lot of products I didn't choose. 

I read two more stories for the magazine. 

I gave Oliver two clonidine over an hour before his appointment for blood work. He was sleepy but definitely not sedated enough. We restrained him and managed a finger stick. Glucose and hemoglobin are normal. Back at home, he took a bath and a nap. I lay down with him for a while and then finished my makeup project. 

I'm writing with Van Dieman's Night Shooting Star ink today. It's dark blue with red sheen and gold shimmer.

Day 4: Tuesday. Today was a nightmare. Oliver had a massive meltdown. The day started poorly. I didn't get any time to myself in the morning because Oliver had a nightmare while Josh was out running. I had just come downstairs when I heard Oliver screaming, "Daddy!" I ran upstairs and tried to comfort Oliver, but he was inconsolable. He kept asking for Josh, apparently having lost him in a dream and being unable to shake the nightmare. I called Josh, thinking his voice might help. But Josh ended up coming home. After seeing Josh, Oliver calmed down and took a bath. Josh managed to finish his run. We took Josh to work as Oliver had OT in the afternoon. Oliver insisted on a second bath. He woke Josh up at 2 a.m. Our lives are kind of ridiculous. 

I didn't do yoga. I didn't read--at all, not even for the magazine. I didn't write five pages or read aloud or read poems. Just before I needed to get ready for OT, Oliver wanted to watch a fuel tanker song video--which doesn't exist. A meltdown of one to two hours followed. He broke the router, threw down a small shelf of magazines, trashed a lamp, broke the porcelain violets bowl my dad gave my mom while they were dating, pulled down five pieces of art, broke two frames, broke one sheet of glass, dumped all my makeup brushes, poured milk on the floor, threw a half-full diet soda can across the kitchen, spilled another liquid I didn't even identify, threw items off a bookshelf, and destroyed my pretty little favorite books cabinet. I barely managed to clean up the glass and the milk. He was so quick. He screamed most of the time. Our Internet, of course, went out, so I couldn't play any of the videos he demanded on his tablet. He yanked on my clothes and hands but didn't actually hurt me. I gave him two clonidine, but it's too slow-acting to be helpful. 

Of course, I had had to ask Josh to call Oliver's therapist and cancel our appointment. Josh said we could pick him up for an hour, but Oliver didn't warm to this idea for some time. When he started to come out of his rage, he looked around the ransacked guest room and said, "What did you do?"

I said, "You broke a lot of things."

We picked up Josh, who fixed the router and tried to clean up. I sat on the couch, staring at nothing. Oliver had a good snack. We declined giving him ice cream. I felt completely disconnected from myself and my life. Nothing seemed to matter. I was dissociated. Numb. Josh went back to work. I don't know what I did. Eventually, I got Oliver ready for bed.

I did do one good thing before the day got so bad. I rearranged my nonfiction bookcase, which I see from my loveseat, in rainbow order. It looks much prettier.

Day 5: Wednesday. Last night, I took a shower and then immediately took a bath, but the hot water hurt my sunburned arms. Josh came to our room after Oliver was asleep, and Josh gave me back tickles. I tried to focus on his touch. I couldn't read for myself or for the magazine. I felt totally disconnected from myself. But tickles, Xanax, and melatonin helped me go to sleep.

I woke up at 4 a.m. to Oliver spreading out on our bed. Josh wasn't in bed, so I went to look for him. He was asleep in Oliver's bed. LOL. So I crawled into Oliver's bed with Josh and slept for another two hours. When I woke up, Josh was downstairs working out. I thought I might get some quiet time to talk to Josh or read a magazine before Oliver woke up, but he got up immediately after I did. So I gave him his morning relaxation bath and got him ready for the day. 

I tried to spend time in my study, but Oliver kept asking for another bath. The thought of sitting in the freezing bathroom for another forty-five minutes was almost unbearable, but he did take a second bath before 9:30 a.m. I went back to my loveseat after the bath and the redressing process. Oliver stood still, staring at me, for thirty minutes while I tried to write. So I asked him to sit down, covered him with a blanket, and read aloud Dorianne Laux poems from Smoke until my mother called to check on me. As I'd told Bruce, I told her that yes, I must be feeling better because I felt unhappy rather than dissociated. 

The day passed fairly quickly. I cleaned out my bin of skincare products and posted on the local BuyNothing group a photo of a box of moisturizers, masks, and serums that I'm just not going to use. Someone picked it up within fifteen minutes. I wrote some more and tried to catch up on blogging from last week. Josh came home briefly for lunch, and I sat with his legs across my lap on the couch. We both felt like napping. Oliver continued to ask for a bath, but somehow, when Josh says no, he stops. When I say no, he asks over and over again until I'm about to lose my mind. I say exactly what Josh says, but it doesn't work. 

When Josh got home, I gave Oliver his actual bath (with bathing) and got him ready for bed. We realized that we'd forgotten to give him his night meds, so the night extended. Someone knocked on the door, and Josh answered to find a delivery guy with an Edible Arrangement addressed to us. It was from "a friend," and the note wished us a better day. I appreciated the acknowledgement and kindness. I also appreciated the chocolate-covered strawberries while Josh ate a pineapple flower. I hope we might convince Oliver to eat some cantaloupe or honeydew, but that's unlikely. It's good timing because I decided today that I'm going to try to eat more fruit even though I'm watching calories. 

Day 6: Thursday. Starting with Sunday's sunbake, this hasn't been an easy week. But Oliver slept in a bit today, so I got some quiet morning time. He also did a little better with getting dressed; maybe he's starting to get that. I haven't finished any books this calendar week. 

Day 7: Friday. Last night, I read from about 7 to 9 and finally caught up on reading for the magazine. This morning, I slept a little on my loveseat and then did nothing for a while (dolce far niente). I read two articles from Bella Grace and two articles from Oh Reader. I'm working on a donation box of craft and stationery supplies. 

I found a small pink bookcase on sale for $36 and ordered it to replace the book cabinet Oliver wrecked. It'll be cheap, but I won't be too upset if Oliver breaks it. And it's pink. I found a revolving bookcase that I'd really like to get next year. 

I made a stack of priority library books: books that are or will soon be late and books that someone is likely to put on hold. Then, I finished reading Smoke (poems) and read the graphic novel The Call of Cthulhu. So I've finished two books today! I started Unless It Moves the Human Heart, a book on writing and teaching. And I wrote "Lightning Bug," my first real love poem to Oliver. I'm happy with it. Josh said it captures what it's like to be Oliver's parent. 

I went to the library, returned some books, and picked up holds. I need to read about five books a week as that's how many I'm checking out! I listened to The Graveyard Book in the car. Bruce and I spent a couple of hours at Barnes, which is in the middle of major renovation. Records are in the cafe. Sections are broken up and moved. Books are double-stacked in rented crates. I feel bad for the booksellers trying to find anything. But exploring the changed bookstore was fun. We spent a lot of time in poetry and lit crit. I took photos of a lot of books I want to check for at the library.

Stillness & Attention: Week 26.

Day 1: Saturday. We're almost at the mid-point of the year! I've kept up my NoBuy for almost six months. But since we got a major bill out of the way, I may spend my birthday money this weekend.

We'd made plans for this to be our outing day. I woke up early (5:30), but we weren't in a hurry. I'm not counting calories today, so I ate cheddar and sour cream Ruffles for breakfast. Oh yes. 

We first went to get groceries. We bought a little bag of dark plums. I don't think I've ever eaten a plum, but they were so pretty. I found fudge peanut cookies (faux Tagalongs) that I haven't seen in a long time. I'll hide them in the freezer. I got a cheesecake parfait but only ate half of it. 

I put away the groceries while Josh cleaned out the car. Then, we went to Lowe's to get a wire for the weed eater. That only took a few minutes. 

First fun stop: Barnes. I want to start going to Barnes at least once a month for the atmosphere and to keep tabs on new releases I may want to read. I like to be aware of what's out; that's what I loved about being a bookseller. 

I decided to buy three journals with my birthday money. Choosing wasn't so easy; Peter Pauper Press has a lot of great new journals. But I can also get those with points on Amazon. So I chose one PPP journal, Floral Fields. I loved the flowers in white, purples, and pinks. I got a Compendium (a great brand for journals) spiral journal that has a Rumi quotation: There is a voice that doesn't use words. Listen. I love spiral jorunals; they're kind of hard to find. And I found the Under the Light of the Moon journal with designs by Katie Daisy on every page. I also got the summer issue of Oh Reader. I really need to catch up on my good magazines. 

We went next to Ulta. I wanted to look for a brown automatic eyeliner with sparkle--not the easiest item to find. I almost got the staff searching the store, but I was able to find Clinique Intense Quickliner in Intense Clove. It's a medium brown with a hint of silver shimmer. Brown eyeliner is allowed on my NoBuy list, so I didn't count that. I did count a Colour Pop Super Shocker Ultra Glitter eye shadow in Dream Much, a bright periwinkle with purple glitter. I fell for another sparkler: Fenty Beauty Diamond Bomb in Rose Rave. It's a rose gold highlighter with gold and pink glitter. I really liked another shade, How Many Carats?, but Ulta was out. The store was super busy. Josh stood in line while I continued to weave through the aisles. 

I tucked my orange Ulta bag into my purse so that the makeup wouldn't melt in the car, and we went to lunch at Carrabbas, one of my favorite restaurants. I had the perfect meal: bread with oil and herbs, an excellent Caesar salad, and the delicious mezzaluna pasta--sweet half moons of pasta with cheeses, chicken, and a tomato cream sauce. And I had two Shirley Temples. I only ate half the mezzaluna, so I'll have the leftovers for tomorrow. Even so, I couldn't have this meal on a calorie-counting day because it's basically my full allotment. But once every couple of months, I'm going to have it anyway. 

We came home and had some time to rest. Josh took a nap. I'm still not really able to sleep during the day. At the last minute, we got ready and went to the Woodpeckers baseball game. Justice for Our Neighbors was the nonprofit of the night. We arrived and immediately found the Dippin' Dots. I got chocolate chip cookie dough in a helmet. Josh got rainbow ice and a soft pretzel. We ate and visited the JFON table before finding our seats. It was hella hot. After an hour, we relocated to the JFON table. I didn't pay a lot of attention to the game. Josh kept looking over at me like he had a crush on me. 

When we got home, we both took showers. I've read almost nothing this weekend as I predicted--too enamored of my company.

Day 2: Sunday. We had another slow morning. I stayed up long enough last night to write in my journal. Today, I worked on my planner, which requires me to spread out with my stickers, pens, and colored pencils. I had my leftover mezzaluna. Josh went on a longer run as he usually does on Sundays. 

We drove to Rockingham in the afternoon to pick up Oliver. In the car, I read Trawling the Silences by Kathryn Stripling Byer aloud to Josh and then to both boys. We finished it. Kay was a visiting professor for a poetry seminar Josh and I took as seniors at ASU. She always encouraged us as writers, as a couple, and later as parents. Kay died in 2017, and we still miss her. Trawling was her final book of poems. 

Oliver seemed willing enough to come home. He had the worst meltdown Mom and Shane have seen over the weekend, but he was happy when they took him swimming at my brother's pool. I unpacked his bag, and we settled back into our routines. I'm happy Josh and I got this weekend to spend together, to rest, and to run around town. 

Day 3: Monday. Josh is back at work, but he got to come home for lunch. Oliver has been eating "biscuits," lite breakfast sandwiches from our freezer. He ate three of my turkey sausage, egg white, and cheese croissants and then ate one of Josh's plant-based "meat," spinach "egg" whites, and "cheese" English muffins. We were surprised to see him eat faux meat, but he did. He must be going through a growth spurt. We usually struggle to get him to eat enough, and he usually eats very little variety. We've found it impossible to force food on him since he got out of a high chair, so thank goodness for vitamins. 

I made a stack in the living room of the short story collections I want to read this summer. It's a little daunting to see!

Day 4: Tuesday. Today was a hard day. I felt a lot of hurt, anxiety, and conflict. I didn't read or write today. I didn't put on makeup--I try not to put it on when it's not going to be fun. Oliver's OT appointment was stressful because he managed to hit his head on the wall while looking out a window. When Oliver is hurt, he asks for help ("You need some help?") and rubs his eyes until they're raw. He says, "Blow your eyes?" I dried his eyes many times with a tissue. Once we were on our way home and we stopped for the customary post-appointment fries, he started to feel better. I'm relieved that we don't have OT next week. It's kind of an ordeal even when it goes well. 

This is a hard day for Josh too, and I'm worried about both of us. A friend I worked with at Borders has spent a lot of time messaging with me today, and she has made me feel less alone. 

Day 5: Wednesday. I didn't sleep enough last night, but I feel lighter today than I did yesterday. I found some comfort talking to Josh in the night. I'm not good at guessing what Josh is thinking and feeling, and telling me is difficult for him. But we're trying to make more of an effort. We also did yoga together this morning, which soothed some of my tension.

The last of my birthday prizes arrived today: stickers from the artist Rongrong DeVoe (Paris and Breakfast at Tiffany's!), Benefit Benetint lip stain (which smells like roses), and yes--Fenty Beauty Diamond Bomb in How Many Carats?. The highlighter is all silver, green, and lavender glitter. 

I read a bizarre story for the magazine and wrote in my journal, trying to get back to myself. I don't feel as hopeful as I did this morning, but I do feel like I have something to work with. 

Day 6: Thursday. Last night, Josh had a board meeting, so I got Oliver ready and put him to bed. He fell asleep quickly. I took a shower and went to bed too. Josh tickled my back. I slept more last night, so I feel better today. I still feel fragile emotionally. I'm not sure how to heal my mind and heart.

I finally got back to Wild Swims by Dorthe Nors. The story "The Fairgrounds" enchanted and haunted me. It's just a few pages long, but I wish I owned a copy of the collection just for that story. Still, reading feels really hard right now. I haven't read substantially in about a week. 

I wrote in my journal with copper and sepia pens. I ran laundry and the dishwasher. Josh got to come home for lunch. Usually, he's already eaten, and we just spend the hour close together on the couch. We have a three-day weekend coming, which I didn't realize. We need the time together. He's at work so much, and when he gets home, it's almost time to get Oliver ready for bed. I think we're both ready for the summer to wrap up. The program is halfway finished. 

But the good news is that Josh got paid today. We now have savings for the first time in a few months, I paid down some debt, and we paid off Josh's medical bills that have been following us around for a year. I also plan on paying off his undergraduate loans so that we won't have that payment when his grad school loan payments restart in August. None of this would have been possible if Josh weren't working so hard this summer. But I do miss him very much. Little bits of time together early in the morning and after Oliver goes to bed don't feel like enough. I'm thankful that we had last weekend, which has probably helped us get through this hard week.

My new (well, fourteen-year-old) poem came out in Gingerbread House Literary Magazine today! https://gingerbreadhouselitmag.com/2022/06/30/james-core/

Day 7: Friday. A new month begins. I made a few major goals for July:

I think I can do all these. Eleven books will bring me to twenty for June and July. I was hoping for twenty-five, but twenty is more likely. I only ended up reading nine books in June. 

I read four books of poetry, three YA novels, and two horror/thrillers. I did read Anatomy and The Other in one day each, which felt great. Sleepless took two days. I read Trawling the Silences during one long car trip. I'd been reading The Art of Losing to Josh for a long time.

My habit tracking was pretty sparse in June. I didn't get all my habits on any one day, and a lot of days only had one glitter green highlight. I hope to do better with similar habits in July.

But I'm doing quite well with my annual reading goal overall. At the halfway point of the year, I've read eighty-one books. I feel like I can handle some more challenging books since I should have no trouble meeting and exceeding my reading challenge for the year.

This evening, I went to the library and picked up three holds: a novel, a poetry chapbook, and a graphic memoir--a nice variety. Then, I went to Michael's and Target with Bruce. We spent time looking at stickers, glitters, paints, pens, toys, and school supplies. I found the most lovely sparkling fairy sticker book that I hope Josh will buy for me at some point. I did not buy it last night! I'm halfway through NoBuy2022. 

Dress Challenge: Days 31-40.

Days 31 and 32: Pajama days!

Day 33: Many years ago, my mom bought me a light pink dress at Anthropologie. It must have been on crazy sale. But I'd never worn it because it's completely sheer, and I couldn't figure that out. But today, I had the thought to wear it over my black dress. 

I wore pink jelly flats with gold glitter, gold earrings with pink rhinestones (which I think I bought at Target many years ago), and Urban Decay Naked Cyber palette eye shadow.

Day 34: Since we're having some gloomy weather, I decided to wear two of my favorite cardigans over a couple of days. Today, I wore my dress with a champagne glitter cardigan from The Limited, Anne Klein champagne glitter wedges, my Banana Republic key necklace, and Urban Decay Naked Ultraviolet palette eye shadow.

Day 35: Now comes my other favorite cardigan: a charcoal open sweater with silver glitter. I wore my Betsey Johnson peacock necklace, black jelly Mary Janes with multi-color glitter, and Revolution eye shadow.

Day 36: Pajama day! Josh got home early and did all the driving!

Day 37: St. Patrick's Day was yesterday, and I feel like wearing green. I wore my dress with an emerald short-sleeved cardigan from Loft (my mom and I each bought one year ago, thrilled to find something in that gorgeous shade of green), a gold necklace with green rhinestones (a Betsey Johnson knock-off I found on Ebay last year), green flats, and Urban Decay Liquid Moondust in Horizon, which is bronze with pink glitter. I also wore Urban Decay marshmallow body glitter on my arms and neck. More exposed skin means more space for sparkles!

Day 38-39: Pajama days!

Day 40: Today is the last day of my challenge. I don't have to go anywhere today as it a teacher work day for my son, but I did wear my dress today--just the dress, no accessories or makeup. It is a good dress, and I'll think to wear it more now. 

I had less laundry during these 40 days, but the best part was thinking differently about my jewelry, shoes, and makeup. I created about 30 unique outfits with one black dress. This showed me how big my wardrobe is and how often I neglect it. During the challenge, I also gave away about 40 pieces of clothing. Wearing one piece for more than a month made me less sentimental (the memories!), less guilt-ridden (what I spent!), and more practical (that long-ago size!) about my clothes. Not a single person has commented on the fact that I've worn the same dress for weeks. I don't think my husband would have noticed if I hadn't told him about the challenge. 

So who cares most about how I look? Me. Recognizing it is good. I'll dress to please myself.

Dress Challenge: Days 21-30.

Day 21: Today, I wore my dress with a pink and purple striped cardigan, Betsey Johnson asymetrical princess earrings (crown on one and scepter on the other), purple flats (which I think have reached the end of their journey), and pink and purple eye shadow from the Urban Decay Moondust palette. My dress got an extra wash today because I splotched it with avocado. So far, it's holding up.

Day 22: It was too warm for a cardigan or tights. I wore my dress with my Betsey Johnson shaky charm heart necklace (one of my favorites) and pink floral heels. The dress continues to be a lint magnet as you can see. I wore iridescent lavender eye shadow from the Huda Rose Quartz palette--which I bought in New York!

Day 23: I wore my dress with lacy gray leggings, purple sequin flats,

Betsey Johnson purple snowflake earrings (which match my very first Betsey Johnson necklace), and Colour Pop purple and green Just a Glitch eye shadow. I also wore Urban Decay highlighter, hence the sparkle.

Wearing the same dress each day hasn't had a major impact on me. I think all my other clothes will seem new when I get back to them, and going through them objectively seems a little easier. I'm mostly just enjoy the mindful challenge of it. I went through my clothes and donated about 45 items to the nearby college's success closet! Now, we have hangers to spare, and since I haven't been wearing and washing them, all my clothes are put away.

Day 24-25: Pajama days!

Day 26: I wore my dress with a short-sleeved peppy purple cardigan, Betsey Johnson purple star earrings, and a purple Betsey Johnson charm bracelet (hand mirror, crown, ballet shoes, all a-sparkle). I wore Hard Candy Star eye shadow quartet in purples. 

Every day, I wear Urban Decay Stay Naked powder foundation (30CP now [light pink], 20CP [fair pink] in deep winter--I don't know about all the shades, but the line has a great variety of options for people with pale skin, including a 10NN ultra-fair neutral that is too pale even for me) and Thrive Causemetics Liquid Lash Extensions mascara (just dreamy in Brynn black).

Day 27: Today, I wore my dress with a white three-quarter sleeve cardigan with black polka dots, knit black Kate Spade espadrilles with white polka dots and grossgrain ribbon ties, Betsey Johnson mismatch fairy earrings, and Fenty Kilowatt Foil highlighter in purples. I love polka dots.

The dress itself is looking a little worse for wear after five recent washings, but it should survive through day 40 at least.

Day 28: A chilly, gloomy day. I brought out my tights again. I wore an open-weave Kelly green cardigan, a Betsey Johnson purple crown necklace, my green sequin Irregular Choice heels, and Tarte eye shadow. 

Day 29: Today was cold again, so I were black fleece tights, a light blue cardigan, my blue Betsey Johnson key necklace, black flats, and Marc Jacobs Blue Me Away Highliner.

Day 30: Today is warmer, but I still wore sweater tights and a fuchsia cardigan with sequins. I wore glittery black flats, Betsey Johnson rose earrings, and purple and pink shadow from the Urban Decay Game of Thrones palette. 

30 days done! Ten to go...

Dress Challenge: Day 11-20.

Day 11 & Day 12: I started the second ten days of my challenge. But these were pajama days.

Day 13: I wore my dress with a short-sleeved purple cardigan with sequin stripes, a Betsey Johnson fairy and crown necklace, and black Poetic License kitten heels. I wore Urban Decay's Naked Ultraviolet eye shadow--one of my favorite palettes. 

Day 14: Today, I wore my dress with a short-sleeved mint green cardigan, a blue and green Betsey Johnson ocean necklace (which Josh gave me for our 16th anniversary), and green glitter shoes. I wore Makeup by Mario glitter eye shadow.

Now, I will show you one of my favorite things: my collection of glitter shoes! I've been wearing glitter shoes for a good 12 years, first Big Buddha (not so durable), then Keds by Kate Spade (great but tight), and then Feversole (loose, many colors) and Irregular Choice (the seahorse ones!). I still have space for two more pair, so maybe I'll fill those next year.

Day 15: I wore my dress with a cornflower blue short-sleeved cardigan, Betsey Johnson mismatch fairy earrings, and light blue glitter shoes. I did "ice eyes" (pale shadow with pale liner) with a blue eye crayon and Marc Jacobs Highliner in Obeyge. 

Day 16: Today, I wore my dress with my Betsey Johnson pink crown necklace and magenta/multi-color glitter shoes. It was too hot for a cardigan!

Day 17: Theatre day! I wore my dress with black sweater tights, a chunky forest green cardigan, my Betsey Johnson peacock necklace,

and my Irregular Choice trellis heels with green sequins and gray rosettes. I wore Anna Sui trio eye shadow with Urban Decay Cosmic Speed black eyeliner.

Day 18: Today was cold and gloomy. I wore a glacier green long-sleeved tee under my dress with black tights, black flats with criss-cross straps, a gold seahorse necklace with multi-color rhinestones, my black sequin duster (to sparkle away some of the gloom), and Stila's Happy Hour palette eye shadow in silver and purple.

Day 19: We had another day of February temperatures though the sun was shining. I wore a lavender mock neck under my dress with black tights, lavender flats, 

and a Betsey Johnson silver snowflake necklace with pearls and purple rhinestones. I love snowflakes all year. I used Revolution's Fortune Seeker eye shadow palette.

Day 20: Today, I wore black stripe tights, a light peachy pink cardigan, pink flats, and my pink Betsey Johnson key necklace. I didn't end up going anywhere today, but I was officially dressed for day 20. 

Dress Challenge: Days 1-10.

Day 1: I started my challenge today. I wore my dress with black tights, green boots, a Valentine's Day cardigan with pink and red stripes, and Betsey Johnson key cluster earrings. I'll want to wear my boots often. 

For makeup, I wore ColourPop Flutter By eye shadow palette and Marc Jacobs Highliner in Brown(Out). The Highliners appear to be discontinued, which is a bummer. They're great eye liners that don't require sharpening. 

I've found that this dress attracts wrinkles and lint. I'll need to find a lint roller. I spent the evening at Bruce's, so I probably picked up some dog hair.

Day 2: Today, I wore my dress with black tights, a navy scallop open cardigan, navy flats with pink glitter hearts, and Betsey Johnson princess mismatched earrings. The weather has been getting so warm that I may be thinking about short-sleeved cardigans. I bought the flats at Gap long ago; I'd forgotten about them. I love anything with hearts. I wore NARS eye shadow duo in Kauai--gold and iridescent purple, Urban Decay black eyeliner in Cosmic Speed, and Urban Decay Game of Thrones lip stain (which I'd also forgotten). One of my major motivations is that I want to make these rediscoveries. 

I remember dressing my Madame Alexander Anne of Green Gables doll when I was eight. I dressed Anne in black tights with navy shoes. My mom told me that black and navy didn't match; what a bummer. I always remembered that, but now, it's apparently totally cool to wear black and navy together. Today is the first time I've really done it. 

Day 3-Day 5: Pajama days! Yes, I'm lucky.

Day 6: I wore a pink turtleneck under my dress with black tights, pink criss-cross strap flats, and my Betsey Johnson pink snowflake and bow necklace. I like the turtleneck-under-dress look, but I don't know if we'll get any more cool days. I wore eye shadow from the Sephora/Disney Ariel palette.

Day 7: Today, I didn't wear tights or a cardigan because it's 68 degrees, which currently feels like summer. I wore the lock and key necklace Josh gave me for our anniversary, a pair of light blue Mary Janes, and shadow from the Fenty Kilowatt Foil palette. If it stays too warm to wear cardigans, I'll have a lot less variety in my outfits! I need to find my short-sleeved cardigans. Tomorrow is supposed to get up to 78!

Day 8: I wore my dress with a short-sleeved pale yellow cardigan (the only yellow article of clothing I own) and my layered Loft pearl and chain necklace. During my first semester of teaching, I broke a strand of pearls on this necklace. I restrung it into two strands.

And I wore one of my favorite pair of heels. These are from Irregular Choice. IC is amazing; watch for sales. I actually bought these on sale through Modcloth. They're called "Cinderella's Choice," which of course made them irresistible. The heels, which are a little challenging, are white glitter. I wore these to the dentist last year because my dentist and her assistants love shoes.

Day 9: Pajama and cleaning day...also dress-washing day. We'll see how it fares!

Day 10: I hung my dress to dry yesterday, and while it's still a lint magnet, it did just fine after a gentle wash. Today, I'm wearing it with ribbed black tights, my green boots, my Banana Republic key necklace (such an amazing find), and a forest green open cardigan. I'm wearing Urban Decay Game of Thrones eye shadow and Wunder2 metallic forest green eyeliner. Ten days done!

My 34th Birthday.

I used to be particular about my birthday: celebration had to happen on the actual day. I've gotten over that, so my birthday spread into mid-June, both ways.

I get a beautiful card in the mail every year from my grandparents. They sent me a Target gift card for fun. Some time soon, I'll go on a spree and remember to tell Nanna and Grandpa what I bought.

Bruce and I have birthdays two days apart (and he's 3 years younger), so we celebrate once together. I focused on writing and Broadway's The Lion King for Bruce's gifts. He gave me a few journals (roses and mermaids) and several books he believed I'd like. I can't wait to read them all.

Josh gave me what I requested: an Urban Decay (my favorite fancy makeup brand) birthday. He gave me gel with large and tiny lilac glitter. He gave me UD's Game of Thrones eye shadow palette. I don't care much about G of T, but the palette is one of my favorites; only 3 of 20 shadows are matte. He gave me a Heavy Metal glitter liner in a new Christmas green. And he gave me two eyeliners--Viper, metallic purple with fuchsia glitter and Electric Empire, a sparkly emerald shade. I'm excited to try everything. I have used the palette and the eye pencils so far.

Mom mailed me a piece of sewing with a dark-haired fairy, a hydrangea in her hand and wild violets at her feet. I have it propped up on the bookcase by my bed. A couple of years ago, Mom gave me a framed drawing of a mermaid with dark hair and green eyes like mine. When we arrived in Charlotte, Mom gave me a gorgeous clear box with rainbow-haired mermaids. I wish I could find more. And heavy seahorse bookends. I love how seahorses just pop up in my life.

After our quiet trip, we saw Dad and Michelle, who gave us gift cards on top of giving us our first getaway. Michelle had a gift she kept forgetting to give me. It' a medium-length silver necklace with a silver circle with amethyst crystals hanging from it. My taste!

So I'm 34 now, some great new books and new makeup to play with along with other sweet objects and fun future shopping. It's a good start.

Favorite Beauty Items.

I may have done this before, but here is a new take.

• Sexy Healthy Hair Tri-Wheat Leave-in Conditioner. This makes such a difference for my wet, tangled hair. It's expensive, so I watch Ulta for deals. We've used this is Oliver's hair too.
• Benefit Porefessional primer. It makes my face feel like a doll's. I've never actually purchased it; I chase samples.
• Urban Decay Moondust eyeshadow palette. From pale pink to dark metal, this palette offers great pigment and amazing fine glitter. I was incredibly excited when this launched. 
• Too Faced Glitter Bomb eyeshadow palette. This followed the UD version, but they are different enough, and I love every glitter trend (okay, maybe not every).
• Cover FX Glitter Drops in Lunar. This small bottle contains incredible shimmer. I mix it with my foundation, and it I really pause to look, I can see pale blue sparkles all over my face. I love it. Eventually, I want to get Aurora, the pink version.
• Fenty highlighter due Kilowatt Foil Freestyle I in 7daywknd/Poolside. These shades defy description. I use them as eyeshadow. Unique violets and lilacs captivate me. 
• Fresh Sugar lip treatment in Rose. I've gotten miniature versions of this as samples, but even though the full-size ones are crazy expensive, I think they are worth it.
• Urban Decay Born to Run Collection Vice Lipstick in Ready?. It's a bright rose shade with bold golden glitter. I have two backups (which feel insufficient). It's a limited edition lipstick.
• Marc Jacobs Beauty Twinkle Pop Stick Eyeshadow in Shoshanna, a teal sparkler. I'd love to have every shade. It's easy to apply directly and to blend with a brush.
• Marc Jacobs Beauty Highliner Gel Eye Crayon Eyeliner in (Stone)Fox, a creamy, shimmery gunmetal shade. Gel pencils have become my choice for eyeliner. 
• Stila In the Moment eyeshadow palette. Full of purples and golds, this is the best I've tried from Stila. Some combination of shades probably looks good on everyone.
• Bobbi Brown Long-Wear Cream Shadow Stick in Pink Sparkle. Great name! This is a gorgeous pale pink with subtle yet plentiful glitter.
• Clinique Almost Lipstick in Pink Honey. The color is sweet, but the best part is the sleek, slender, silver design, which reminds me of getting my first lipstick at 12 on Easter--Clinique Almost Lipstick in Almost Kissed. Mom made me feel special and beautiful with that, and I still appreciate it.
• Disney & Sephora Cinderella eyeshadow palette. This was a magical collaboration that ended too soon. I remember seeing that stunning blue and silver packaging. The blues, silver, whites, and greens are just gorgeous.
• Ponds Evening Soothe Wet Cleansing Towelettes. When I was in critical care after Oliver was born, my mama bought these to clean my face. The scent is soothing because of that memory.
• Bath and Body Works Sweet Cinnamon Pumpkin body splash. This was the favorite of my darling friend Melissa, and she got me into it too. It's the perfect balance of spice and sweet, and it makes me feel confident.
• Urban Decay marshmallow body glitter. My brother gave me this when mine got ruined in a sink pipe flood (I learned: no makeup under the sink!). It smells like marshmallow. I feel intriguing when I wear it.

Brand Names.

Growing up, I shifted from Limited Too to Old Navy to Loft-when-it's-on-sale. I remember one point, the first months of 11th grade, I bought one Guess? tee and one DKNY tank. I wore Mudd jeans and Delia's everything else. Otherwise, I don't remember caring much about brand name clothes or accessories. My dad bought me a sleeveless Ralph Lauren top and an RL jean jacket. I think I wore them out.

Banana Republic is high above me, but I do have a couple pairs of work pants from there--I call them money pants. Maybe I'll be able to wear them (I loved the stretchy Sloan fit) again someday as everyday pants. I also have a plum and lavender silk scarf I've used as a headband and an amazing multi-chain, multi-metal (silver, gold, black) necklace full of little skeleton keys.

I own a few items from Jones New York. When I had an interview at Borders many years ago, Mom bought me a gray shell and a pair of gray silk pants. Funny--we each had a pair of the pants but sort of shared the matching jacket. I also wore that duo to my first full-time teaching interview.

I love Steve Madden shoes. I've worn out several pairs of his shoes, especially the Madden Girl style. I'm having to say goodbye to a sensational pair of gray heels and of black heels. I wore them every week at work. I wore his bowling shoes for years--black ones, blue ones, and red ones.

I have two Kate Spade items. One is the beautiful journal I'm using now, with a painting of a stack of blue and pink books on the cover. The other is a collaboration between Kate Spade and Keds: slip-ons with magenta trim and all-over, multi-color glitter.

Of course, to say I have a weakness for prestige cosmetics would be an understatement. I've long loved Urban Decay and Too Faced, but I've also become interested in Marc Jacobs Beauty, MAC, and Fresh. I like heavy glitter makeup in whimsical, intriguing packages.

My other brand love is Betsey Johnson. But I think I've bought some faux versions of her jewelry on Ebay, and I'm okay with that. It's her style that I want.

So I'm a little more into brand names than I thought. Mostly, I think I try something, and if I love it, I can get obsessed or just loyal and excited.

Do you have any beloved brands? What do you think of that?

Restoration: Week 50.

This year is almost over. I've failed at some of my goals, and I've succeeded at others. My word of the year has been Restoration, and I have a couple of weeks left with it. I have been thinking about my word of the year for 2019, and I'll be asking others about their words. Some 2018 words have been Wellness, Advocate, and Balance. I hope I've supported these.

A great discovery: I got Cover FX glitter drops in a $21 beauty subscription box. The drops are usually $35+. I plan on using my next round of Amazon points to buy another color, maybe the icy blue. In any case, the color looked too dark for me but when I mixed a drop or two with my foundation, wonderful shimmer appeared all over my face. I love it! It's definitely a new priority in my makeup routine, and it reminds me what kind of person I want to be (the kind who wears glitter drops!).

I found a beautiful top at Old Navy: deep blue velvet with ruffle sleeves and all-over glitter. It's so pretty, and the price went down to $7 (!), so I have the other colors too: charcoal and rose-petal pink.
Obviously, glitter keeps me going.

I finished the poetry book Red Trousseau. I started the poetry book Firstborn (Louisa Gluck's first book). And I reached my extra goal of 60 books! I think I'm restoring my confidence in myself as a reader.

On Friday, while Oliver was at school, Josh and I had a fire with a two-hour log. Then, we did it again! We even pulled out my wonderfully snuggling mint Shabby Chic blanket. I hope we have another have another fire soon. It's a restorative luxury.

I finished my peacock quill Compendium journal and started a journal from Target: red with white polka dots for Christmas. A new journal often feels like a new chance.

And just because I felt like it, I watched Passengers again (4th time!). I want to practice not limiting myself if something is safe and gives me joy.

Some Stuff I Just Love Right Now.

• Makeup Remover Farmacy Green Clean Makeup Meltaway Cleansing Balm. Long name, but just a little of the balm quickly wipes away my eye makeup, whatever pigment or glitter I'd been wearing.
• Pentel Sparkle Pop Pens. The truth? I buy a pack each time I go to Target.
• The poet Mary Oliver.
• Peter Pauper Press journals, of course.
• Character sticky flags (get 'em here). I use them in every book I read.
• Leggings that pass as pants.
• Tiny owls.
• Blush.
• Black metal jewelry.
• Socks with shea butter.
• Lilac scent.
• My black washcloths with white hearts.
• Wearing pink.
• My Disney Princess pajamas.
• A blue glitter notebook from Mom, which I use for lists such as Books and Writers to Read, Story Ideas, and Movies to Watch.

On Glitter, Shimmer, and Sparkle.

I should be coated in glitter all the time. It's a kind of armor. It protects my sense of self. I'm trying to remember how I went wild for glitter.

When I was little, I liked and requested "glue and glitter."

When I was a preteen, my close friend Leah brought treasure to church: various bottles of glitter that her mom had bought at a fabric store. My close friends and I painted our nails with clear polish and poured on the glitter. I was delighted. We divided up the glitter. We all liked the white. I ended up with baby blue, baby pink, and fuchsia. I may still have them in my craft trunk.

I discovered Gelly Roll Stardust glitter pens as a teeanger. On my birthday, I'd go to a fancy craft shop and buy the pens by the fistful. I was journaling madly with them.

When I turned 16, I discovered so much sparkling makeup. I was thrilled, not having known such wonders existed. Eyeshadow, eyeliner, lip gloss, body powder. I went wild for sparkle.

At jobs, I would tone it down until Christmas time, when sparkle wasn't strange. Everyone got used to my sparkling. I just kept wearing it after Christmas.

I still wear glitter--my favorite makeup, clothes, and shoes are shimmery. I always want to wear some kind of glitter.

The Magic of Shadow Palettes.

Few things are as exciting and enchanting as a new eyeshadow palette. Single shadows are fun, and I like leaving Sephora or Ulta with just one pop of color. But palettes are beautiful and full of possibility. Prestige cosmetics tend to have gorgeous packaging and presentation and I don't mind paying for that. I take the palette as it comes though I may not use every shade.

My current favorite palettes are probably Urban Decay's Moondust and Too Faced Glitter Bomb. The former's case is gunmetal glitter, and every shade from pale peach to cobalt is lovely. The latter has shaky glitter on its black case, and the glitter does not disappoint. But I've had so many gorgeous palettes.

When I first fell for expensive makeup, I fell again for Hard Candy (which now only exists as a Walmart line). My chest still flutters when I think of all those small silver eyeshadow quartets. I bought two on my 16th birthday: Pixie (sparkling white and pink with a red glitter black) and Disco 2000 (glitter purple, cream, and brown with a multicolor glitter liner shade). Tiny (a few inches) glittery sponge applicators and angled liner brushes were in each set.

These brought me a joy that got me though my summer youth group trips and my first days at a public high school. Everyone might be more popular than I, more beautiful, more ambitious, more intelligent...but I was a writer and I wore fantastic makeup. Getting pretty got me out of bed. I remember at a camp, one girl from my youth group reverently asking if she could look in my makeup bag, so we sat together on my bunk, and I showed her my treasures.

I've also loved Too Faced small palettes with plenty of sparkle, especially the country-music-themed one. And I have Cinderella, Little Mermaid, and Aladdin palettes from a Sephora and Disney project. Those are dreamy! And again, the packaging is so satisfying--princess silhouettes, sparkle, velvet. And I love all the names for each shade.

Mom and I have talked about the appeal of palettes. We agreed that it's related to our girlhood (and current!) obsession with dolls that have trunks full of clothes and accessories--color, shine, and endless combinations. I love sharing the fun of palettes with my mom. I probably gave her one or two palettes a year as gifts. Buying makeup for others is so fun.

I also like the Z palettes or empty magnetic palettes that let me create my own combination of shadows. I have a Tarte palette with green and black sequins. It's huge, and I've barely filled 1/3 of it with greens, blues, and pinks.

Palettes are makeup fun every day!

Story Snippet: A Lipstick and a Journal.

I breezed into Ulta, a bright and happy place to be. This may have been last October. I had the money (for that moment) to buy a lipstick I'd been wanting: Urban Decay's Lovelight. It was a lovely, shimmering pink.

As I walked to checkout, I noticed a pink display with a stack of journals. I picked one up soft, hot pink, and engraved with Beauty Notes. $5!

When I was in line, I looked down at one lipstick and one journal. That seemed to sum me up pretty well.

Uses for Pouches.

I love little bags--makeup, pencil, and so on. But I have a lot of them. I subscribed to ipsy, a program that mails 5 good-sized, personalized beauty samples each month plus a mini makeup bag, all for $10 a month. Some I love, and some I don't like. I want to find uses for all of them. Here are some ideas:

• Storage for certain makeup items. I keep my major-glitter items (loose glitter, glitter roll-ons, and such) in an animated Cinderella pouch that I bought as a teenager. I don't have to dig in my main bag for my crazy glitter.
• Storage for sticky notes. A pink and black ipsy bag holds my sticky flags (especially character flags) and other sizes of sticky notes. They don't get lost and warped in the bottom of a big bag.
• Storage for current pens. Depending on the design of my current journal, I use certain colors of pens. I gather up all my pens in those colors. Right now, a silver, glittered pouch with mint blue lining (that was a win, ipsy!) holds pink and green pens.
• Storage for basic pens. I have a pink suede and black lace (ipsy!) pouch dedicated to black- or blue-ink basic pens. I use black pens for lists and prompt responses in my journal, so I can find what I need easily.
• Sensory distraction kits. One little purse my Mom crocheted for me and a purple-silver pouch she gave me hold items that can help me in a crisis: beauty, sparks for the senses, and reminders. I'll write more about these soon. I love the beautiful packaging even for a gift to myself.
• Storage catchall for pens. Most of my pen pouches hold a weird variety of writing utensils, such as markers, gel pens, gel highlighters, and so on. If I grab a pouch, like the beautiful purple fairy pouch Mom made for me, I know I'm likely to find something I can use. 
• Travel makeup bags. As a teenager I found silver bag with black musical notes and hot pink trim, and it now has its own foundation, powder, mascara, and lash curler. I keep it stocked, so I don't forget anything. I usually put the bag and an eyeshadow pallet into the antique blue traincase Mom gave me. 
• Samples. Sometimes, I use pouches to sort my sample beauty items. I put pretty Papaya Art labels on the pouches, and they go in a decorative box.
• I've not tried this yet, but I'd like to have a pouch for lip glosses. I might use them more if I could find them easily.
• I haven't tried this either, but pouches could be a cute alternative to gift wrap. I love functional gift wrapping!

What ideas do you have?

Marveling at What I Already Have.

I'm a collector. I make good use of my collection, but I need to make more of a habit of appreciating and using what I have.

When I started keeping a journal in earnest, I bought my journals one at a time and filled them in about two weeks. I had a fantasy of having dozens of journals to choose from at home--all styles, colors, and designs. Now, I have that. I'll buy a journal if it is very special, but I mostly just choose from a green bin with white polka dots under my bed.

I have enough reading material to last years, so a new book has to be pretty special. I love finding good used books. I have several $1.99 e-books that don't take up any room. Having books near me, even electronically, makes me feel calm.

As an older teen, I fantasized about having fancy makeup and many expressive options. I dreamed of colors and glitter. And now, I have so much awesome makeup. Putting on makeup is play time. I don't really need anything--only an unusual color or an intensity glitter finish will tempt me.

I have pens to last a year or more. Pens are essential, and new ones are always welcome. I just occasionally add pens here and there--maybe one red Stardust Gelly Roll. I organize my pens by color and use a pouch to hold the colors I'm using in my current journal. Right now, the pouch holds pink and green pens. I love organizing anything by color. I have pens in color-coded mugs all around the house, and the pens serve as a reminder of the writer I am and the writer I want to be.

I'm thankful for all I have in these areas. They are multiple dreams come true.

Waste Not; Want Not: My New Makeup Bag.

Once I realized I wasn't going back to work, I brought my office supplies home. I had pretty upright desk organizers in teal and in white. I had the idea to use them to organize my makeup. So I stored eyeshadow palettes and brushes in these organizers on my counter and a nearby book (as in nail polish and bath products) shelf. My eyeliners are wedged in the corner of the counter in a tall Ariel mug.

I've been using a beautiful lilac and cream Snow White and the Huntsman bag to store everything else: blushes, highlighters, powder, eyeshadow singles, and so on. But the bag is a bit too small. I wanted a bag that would lie down flat and have more space. I couldn't find anything that was a good size. Sephora had some good bags, but they were expensive and sold out quickly. Plus, I simply didn't have money.

Several years ago, I made a big effort to bring joy to my work life. My desk was colorful. I ever ordered a lunch box from Pottery Barn Teen: chocolate brown with multicolored polka dots and Becky stitched in purple.

I thought it was a pity that I almost never used the lunchbox anymore.

Ding! It lies flat for easy access but also stands up to take up less room. The makeup stash is still unruly, but it's an improvement, and I'm not longer wasting a lovely object. As for the Show White bag, it now holds glitters (tubes, jars) on the bookshelf in my room.

Makeup Priorities.

I've managed to whittle down my routine, so I can get ready in 30 minutes. Sometimes I sleep too long or wake up early, so I prioritize my makeup based on how much time I have. I have a lot of samples, so I get plenty of variety. I love putting on makeup! Here are the tools I use in order of importance and available time:

1. Foundation (Revlon ColorStay in Ivory)
2. Eyelash curler and mascara (whatever sample I have on hand)
3. Eye sparkle (silver  Urban Decay shadow in Uzi)
4. Translucent powder (Maybelline Fit Me)
5. Lip balm (whatever is on hand, often Burt's Bees)
6. Primer under foundation (whatever sample I have on hand, but Benefit Porefessional is my favorite)
7. Eyeshadow primer (NYX Glitter Primer)
8. Eyeshadow (often, the colors match my clothes)
9. Eyeliner (gel pencils are my favorite right now)
10. Moisturizer under primer (whatever sample I have on hand)
11. Lipstick (my favorites are Urban Decay Vice and Fresh Sugar)
12. Blush (often Too Faced--it's heart-shaped!)
13. Lip liner (whatever sample matches the lipstick)
14. Highlighter (Urban Decay's free birthday gift from last year!)