Hopes for Oliver.

Our son, Oliver, is seven years old. But in many ways, he's three or four. He has autism. And even though he's high-functioning in some ways, his disorder is a massive challenge for all of us. He has seen many doctors (a psychiatrist, a neurologist, his pediatrician), teachers, counselors, and therapists. He's in a classroom specifically for children with autism. He has both in-school and private therapy. He see several professionals on a weekly or monthly basis. He heart is full of love, and his spirit is a happy one. But communication is broken at best, and all three of us grieve in our ways.

These are some of the hopes I have for Oliver. I hope

• Oliver's 2nd/3rd (combined in an autism classroom) will be as kind and attentive as his K and 1st teacher has been. I hope Oliver will respond well to his first male teacher.
• Oliver will learn to express his feelings and needs in general. Now, he can tell us he's sad, but he can't explain. We can tell when he's sick, but he can't tell us what hurts.
• Oliver will be able to self-manage enough to go see musicals, ballets, and concerts. I think they would enrich his life.
• We will be able to share what we love with Oliver, and he would find value in that.
• Oliver will love and explore music. I hope we can communicate with each other through songs, maybe listening to each other's playlist.
• Oliver will find a kind, intelligent, and understanding partner.
• Oliver will be able to be a loving partner.
• Oliver will be able to have children if he wants to.
• Oliver will learn about his disorder and use tools and rituals to keep autism from owning him.
• Oliver will continue to develop a sense of humor.
• Oliver will learn to handle activities of daily living.
• Oliver will learn to self-soothe but also ask for what he needs (and learn what that is).